Thursday 14 April 2011

Never thought this would be me.

Hey, first off I wanted to say a massive thank you to everyone that commented, you don't realise what that meant to me :)
My boyfriend is being supportive, I realised that my previous post maybe didn't explain that very well! He explained he's just trying different tactics to try and help, that was tough love apparently!
He doesn't realise no matter how many times I tell him, that, he can't fix me, only I can do that, and there are going to be times when I'm not strong enough.
I phoned in work today, tried to explain everything I'm going through, and the stress of worrying about work and pay, but I need to rest or I'll come in and won't be able to cope. My H.Rs answering machine was very supportive!
Today could very well be a day in bed, I spent the entire day mass cleaning yesterday just to stop my mind thinking!
My dose of anti-depressants has been doubled so hopefully I may be a bit more with it soon.

I just never thought this would be me you know? I was strong when I was younger and so happy and now I'm this person who can't even cope with getting dressed for work.
There is such horrible judgement on depression, a third think your faking another third of people think your crazy and everyone else is depressed like you.
Just admitting that I'm on medication for it is tough, people get embarrassed for you!!

Anyway I'll stop filling my blog up with long rambles.
Hopefully some arty crafty inspiration will hit and I'll be kept busy by that!

Kim xxxx
Sent from my BlackBerry smartphone from Virgin Media

3 comments:

  1. Hey, every outlet is an outlet. If you can ramble about it, who cares what others think? I hated it when people judged me. But now, I really couldn't care less. Alright, my friend base is a little limited now, but the good thing is, loads of time to craft without people trying to get me to go on a night out.

    You'll pull through! Give it time and everything will start to look a bit more shiny again ;) Mmmmmmm shiny...

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  2. Already you are sounding more positive - in one day. People don't understand unless they have had depression touch their own lives (no-one would question you if you had a visible illness!)

    Have a good rest and dream of glittery things...

    And ramble away - its your blog, you can do what you like!! (And we won't judge you)

    Ali x

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  3. Thank you my lovelies, I am feeling a bit more me, but I am cuccooned in my leopard print Duvet with my gorgeous jacky (7 yr old pup) surrounded by 4 pink Walls watching Phillip schofield...what more could a girl want?!
    Xxx

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